Why you should aim LOW for your New Year’s resolution for the sake of your sanity – and the key mistakes to avoid

Many of us are guilty of setting unrealistic New Year’s resolutions and giving up on them just a few short months into the year.

While goals are an important part of setting your intentions for the year ahead, life coach and counsellor Linda Magson is convinced we’re going about them all wrong.

‘We get this sense of failure if we set these goals that are too ambitious, too high, and convince ourselves other people will think we’re a failure,’ Ms Magson told Daily Mail Australia.  

‘Then we end up thinking, “I just shouldn’t have tried” and go back to our baseline.

‘More often than not, it’s not the person who’s failed their resolution. It’s their plan to get there, or the goal itself.’

It’s also important to think about the reason behind your goal, Ms Magson said.

The most popular New Year’s resolution has long been to lose weight, but will losing X number of kilos really change your life? Ms Magson thinks not. 

‘Often there can be some sort of pressure that makes you think, “Wouldn’t it be nice to be healthier” or “I want to fit into those clothes that fit a decade ago”,’ she said.

‘They pop to mind because health-related goals are the most popular, but they’re not specific enough.

‘Why is it so important to you to lose weight, what’s the value? How will it impact your life, health and relationships?

‘Usually it boils down to wanting to feel more confident. That’s the important thing.’

So rather than focusing your New Year’s resolution on insecurities or ‘negative’ aspects of your life, Ms Magson urged people to pay more attention on adding positive things to their routine.

Here’s some goals she believes can help improve everyone’s life and how to achieve them. 

While many of us focus our resolutions on weight and fitness, Ms Magson encouraged goal setters to consider some small, specific changes they could make – like decluttering 

Create a joy list

One thing Ms Magson strongly urged people to try is creating a ‘joy list’.

A joy list is a catalogue of all the activities that make you happy. It could anything from playing a certain sport, to enjoying a specific meal.

‘Anything that brings you joy, makes you feel energised or is good fun can be added to your joy list, and you can continue building through the year,’ Ms Magson said.

‘Then you can start setting time aside – whether it be daily or a few times a week, depending on your schedule – to have moments of joy.’

By habitually making time for yourself as part of your routine, you’ll be left feeling happier and refreshed. 

‘It might go a little way towards making a difference, or it could make a significant difference,’ Ms Magson said.

‘By doing something on your joy list, at the end of each month you’ll be feeling more pleasure in life. It can make everything else feel lighter.’ 

Gratitude

Gratitude has turned into a bit of a buzzword for self-improvement, but Ms Magson is confident the attention is warranted.

‘Happiness can feel fleeting. If you got a new job, or appliance, or relationship – it can make you feel happy for a while then it fades and you’re looking for the next thing,’ she said.

‘Whereas when you practice daily gratitude, that feeling lasts longer as you’re reminding yourself of those positive achievements.

‘It can be really powerful to mentally run through a list of the things you’re grateful for when you wake up in the morning. Those first five minutes of the day are so important. 

‘By doing this simple thing we can increase our mood, sense of identity and feel as though we’re more on top of things.’

One thing Ms Magson strongly urged people to try is creating a ‘joy list’ and adding a joyful activity to their routine

Declutter

We’ve all heard it before: ‘Cluttered space, cluttered mind.’

Yet many of us still overlook the effects our environment can have on our wellbeing.

‘Decluttering generally doesn’t make it onto a New Year’s list but the idea of life being too complex and too stressful is something everyone feels,’ Ms Magson said.

‘Many people just want a simpler space but it can feel too overwhelming to start.

‘I’d recommend choosing one space at a time – it could be your workspace, entrance, bedroom – and focus on decluttering it.

‘Ask yourself, “What would make this really conducive to me? What would make it feel like home?” and work towards that.’

It’s also important to make sure your environment doesn’t end up too plain or ill-suited to your routine.

‘It may be that you need surfaces free to feel relaxed. Other people might need more personal objects around them,’ Ms Magson said.

‘Some need visual reminders that the world is a beautiful place, others are too easily distracted.

‘Put yourself first and find what’s comfortable for you.’

Try something new 

‘Trying something new’ sounds like a goal Ms Magson would slam for its vagueness, but she wants people to consider it in its most simple terms.

Every week, or every month, we should be trying something new. Whether it be something as big as taking on a hobby, to something as small as driving a different way home.

‘While it’s good to have a routine, it’s vital to break that routine at least once a week, if you can,’ Ms Magson said.

‘It helps give you different perspectives and keeps you open and flexible when faced with new ideas and change. 

‘You might learn something new, or you could feel refreshed and energised.’

Ms Magson suggested decluttering as an important goal, saying: ‘Decluttering generally doesn’t make it onto a New Year’s list but the idea of life being too complex and too stressful is something everyone feels’

How to set achievable goals

So you’ve got your goals, now how do you achieve them?

Ms Magson believes the first step is framing your resolutions as something exciting, rather than a chore.

‘It’s not about “I can’t do this anymore”, it’s about finding a positive replacement,’ she said.

‘Say you want to improve your eating habits. Instead of thinking, “I can’t eat unhealthy food anymore” think of some healthier meals you enjoy, that you’ll look forward to eating.

‘It takes a lot of energy to cut bad habits and can make you feel bad for doing them in the first place.

‘Instead, refocus your goal as a change or replacement – something that will make you feel good.’ 

Also, despite giving advice on New Year’s resolutions, Ms Magson doesn’t believe the New Year is always the best time to start enacting new habits.

‘It’s not the right time for a lot of people because it’s already such a busy period,’ she said.

‘However, there is a great sense of structure, and sometimes pressure, to have a New Year’s resolution.

‘Think about the things you want to change and plan for them. Then, when the time is right for you, you can start introducing your plan.’

She also urged people to consider using planning frameworks, like SMART or POWER, to properly prepare themselves for their adjusted routine. 

‘I like to use the analogy of buying a car,’ Ms Magson said.

‘You wouldn’t just go and buy a car without trying it out first, you’d research it and take it for a test drive.

‘Goals and resolutions are similar, we need to plan and sample them before committing.’